My husband and I have been married for over 12 years. We have 5 beautiful children together ranging from 11 years to 8 months. When we were married I was a size 6. After 5 children I am still about 80 pounds over what I used to be. I have always been thin, until I had kids. Now “metabolic syndrome” they call it is making my body think it is in starvation mode and will not burn fat, just keeps storing it. My husband knows that my weight really bothers me…..But my brother and his wife go to the strip club. So we’ve been going for several years, becuz I don’t look like that anymore, why can’t he still look at it? How stupid am I to think that he really was only looking, and it didn’t go beyond that?We had a discussion last Friday night and he was finally honest with me. I asked if he fantasized about any of the strippers…of course he lied, and lied…but finally said “yes” and the fantasies are in vivid detail and he described a few to me (I’m sure they were VERY watered down). THese fantasies were going on while I was always right next to him. But he says these fantasies are only when I take him to the strip clubs. Of course, more and more lately, he ALWAYS wants to go to the strip club.I was devasted when he told me this. This man is my lover, my best friend and my life. i can’t imagine life with out him….but now I can’t ever imagine him touching me again. It is like he has ripped out my heart. Am I wrong for feeling this way? Do all men fantasize? Does he do this when we have been having sex….he denies this last part, but he has lied so much lately!I can honestly say that I have not fantasied about sex with other men…it has never even crossed my mind because I am happy in the relationship I am in, I don’t need any one else. Does this mean he is not happy with our relationship? He says it’s not cheating, and he would never never cheat on me…but he’s ____ing other women in his head! HOw it that NOT cheating?
The opposite of love isn’t hate. It’s indifference. And if you hate me, that means you still care and we’re still connected and I still have a chance to set you right.
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